Archived [OLD] Store and Money

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Larsi

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@Larsi :‭‭2 603 971 680‬ beri
@Larsi 86587678
@Larsi 86587678
I will use my combined ‭2 777 147 036‬ beri to purchase
277 of these:
250 experience
Price: 10.000.000 Beri
For ‭69 250‬ EXP.
With the 2000 from last 2 activities, exp gained from skypiea and last 2 reviews:
Reviewer EXP Gained:
11 pages × 300EXP = 3300EXP
Ranger's review:
@Larsi
-Personality: 15 (could have been more in depth, but it was good)
-Story Progression: 19 (did a good job controlling multiple characters, but some pacing was rushed)
-Combat Prowess: 15 (good but some over playing of ability)
-Descriptions: 17 (generally very good)
-Enjoyable: 17 (averaging scores)
-Post Count: 57
-Rule Break: 1 (too many moves per turn, stamina on Enel overplayed in beginning)
noncanon EXP: 30359 + 10% = 33394.9 EXP
Reviewer EXP: 5x300+3x100=1800
As well as my total EXP:
@Larsi - ‭266 694‬ EXP
It will put me at ‭376 439‬ EXP, or level 94:
Level 94
Requirement to next level: 11976 XP
Total XP accumulated: 365881
I will then purchase this with crew coffers:
Level 60 named NPCs: 5 max
90 million beri
Requires level 86.
5 of this
Level 65 named NPCs: 2 max
100 million beri
Requires level 93.
2 of this
Another ship(each crew gets a free ship)
Price: 100.000.000 Beri
and 1 of this, for a total of 850 000 000

Lastly, I buy this for myself:
Devil fruit awakening:
Can be bought 1 time.
Description: Gives your devil fruit +20 stat points(only applicable if you have 100 mastery, but you will also be able to have 100 mastery at any level, regardless of stat caps.) This allows for another strong addittion to your devil fruits power. Talk to the Gorosei for approval of said ability before purchase.
Requires: level 70
Price: 120.000 EXP
Putting me at ‭256 439‬ EXP, or level 83:
Level 83
Requirement to next level: 8652 XP
Total XP accumulated: 255067
 
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Vergo
[IMG]

Level 70
70 x 5 = 350
Strength: 62+19=81
Speed: 59+19=78
78x2=156
-Reaction: 78
-Movement: 78
Vitality: 67+14=81
81x2=162
-Durability: 81
-Stamina: 81
Haki: 81
81x2= 162
-Armament Haki:81
-Observation Haki:81
Martial Arts: 81
81x2=162
-Bamboo: 81
-Brawling: 81


Yarisugi
[IMG]

Level 50
50 x 5 = 250
Strength: 51+10=61
Speed: 65+15=80
80x2=160
-Reaction: 80
-Movement: 80
Vitality:51+10=61
61x2=122
-Durability:61
-Stamina:61
Haki: 42
42x2=84
-Armament Haki:42
-Observation Haki:42
Martial Arts: 41
41x2=82
-Swordmanship: 82


G-5 Marines(500)
[IMG]

Level 20
20 x 5 = 100
Strength: 25+4=29
Speed: 25+4=29
29x2=58
-Reaction: 29
-Movement: 29
Vitality: 25+4=29
29x2=58
-Durability: 29
-Stamina: 29
Martial Arts: 25
25x2=50
-Swordmanship: 50
One time beri reward:
-400 000 000 Beri
-200 000 000 Beri extra for anyone from the World Government that exposes the corruption.
Participant: @Oreki
Host: @Gintoki

Start: https://thrillerbark.com/threads/g-5.181/post-43550
End: https://thrillerbark.com/threads/g-5.181/post-46663
Extra Info: Canon Island / Vergo being traitor revealed
Gintoki's score
Personality: 16
Story Progression: 16
Combat Prowess: 16
Description: 17
Enjoyability: 14

Experience: 5144

We see room lightened by the rays of the sun a room filled with light. Fam, this is redundant. There's no need to say filled with light when you already said that it's lightened.

I enjoyed Vergo while reading this but the way the fight started didn't feel as smooth as it should have been. It was kinda rushed and the reasoning for it "to see what you're made of" is ok, you could have definitely had Vergo show some interest in Nero first before just saying "let's fight".

Oreki's score
Personality: 17
Story Progression: 15
Combat Prowess: 17
Description: 15
Enjoyability: 15
Rule break: 1

Experience: 8487

I then cupped my hands noting the water was cold but good enough to freshen me up. I felt the cold water. This is redundant. We already know that you feel the cold water because you said it in the first sentence(italicized). No need to say it again.

Nero stopped, now looking at Vergo as he made a wild grab, caught the Vergo by the collar, and gripped his hand tight. He kept one hand clenched on Vergo's collar. You controlled Vergo right here by not giving Gintoki a chance to react to the grab attempt. You should be RPing that you made an attempt to grab Vergo, not that you had already grabbed him.

So overall, the fight felt pretty lackluster. It didn't have enough impact it should have at the end when Vergo being a spy was revealed. I feel like this was due to how short it was as it imo could have definitely gone longer. Otherwise, It was aight.

Btw Oreki, include Miyagi more in your fights.
Only killed Vergo and revealed him being traitor.

Level during the island: 62
[automerge]1576310161[/automerge]
250 experience
Price: 10.000.000 Beri
Use my 70% of the amount of my whatever amount after this week activity to buy this
 
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Last edited:
Messages
2,723
Reaction score
13,061
Points
10,800
Salty Doubloons
1,127
One time beri reward:
-100 000 000 Beri
Frayz's Score
Personality: 17
Story Progression: 16
Combat Prowess: 14
Description: 12
Enjoyability: 15
Post Count: 10

Experience: 7050

Even with Haki, how would you know Mia was a revolutionary? That's impossible. Haki doesn't reveal one's intentions.

Oh, nevermind. I found the reason why as I read through.

Oreki's Score
Personality: 17
Story Progression: 15
Combat Prowess: 14
Description: 13
Enjoyability: 15
Post Count: 9

Experience: 4230

Personality seems to be your strong point. You did a good describing Kuro and his ultimate goal and only care for that. Also, that piece about where he felt at peace in isolation was a nice touch.

There's a problem with your narration. You talk like it's first-person narration when instead using 3rd person. What is mean is this "Since it was her, she probably knew who was coming inside just from his footsteps. Her perception is good." You would say something like this in first-person where you don't know what she's thinking but just making educated guesses on what you know. The "probably" is not fit for 3rd person as the narrator, you know everything. So why would you say probably? It's a casual laid-back tone not fit for 3rd person, but good for first. Go read some books. You'll see what I mean.
Claiming the one time reward for Syrup Village and then buying 7 Rare Candies
250 experience
Price: 10.000.000 Beri
 
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